Then, of course, bodies flung around right when the drums hit and the instruments all came in.

I’d close my eyes and remember everyone yelling along to Simmons’ words, where there’s only one small riff quietly playing in the background but the voices overtook all of the space. After that show, I’d put on the record and hear “Void,” the opener that begins with isolated vocals and has a subtle build up until it crashes into a crazy, introspective instrumental. And as soon as you experience that, the listening experience is different. I can see why the early 2010s were special for that band and all of the bands surrounding them they must’ve been playing tons of shows, and that’s just a constant reminder of the vitality of songs that you can mosh, crowdsurf, and stagedive to.

Once I saw everyone’s live, visceral reaction to “I Tore You Apart In My Head,” I understood the purpose of aggressive music. I was converted on that random school night in 2017 and never shut up about them after that. Throughout the night, the band drifted in and out of violent, post-hardcore anthems that provoked everyone to mosh, and slow, atmospheric songs that felt like dreams. The show was for Light We Made, the album where they strayed from emo and played with dream pop and autotune, and it was basically the preface of their breakup. I dragged a friend from high school who knew nothing about emo. It was on 4/20, and as someone who didn’t smoke weed, I thought it would be a fun way to spend the holiday. Then they announced a show at a local venue called Revolution Bar. I didn’t do too much digging into them after that. “Defeat The Low” is tame, Jon Simmons’ vocals struck me as distinct and calming, and I adored the way the song turns into a kind of chant only about 30 seconds in. I wasn’t ready for the constant yelling and absolutely relentless anger of their hit “I Tore You Apart In My Head” - it was too much for me. I don’t know why it was that song I found first it’s what someone would call a deep cut.

The first song I heard by Balance And Composure was the last on Separation, “Defeat The Low,” probably in the mid-2010s. I started first with mainstream pop punk bands I won’t name, and then ended up obsessing over Joyce Manor and La Dispute. It would take my depression and anxiety to settle in a couple of years later until I turned to emo for solace. I was 10 and listening to Taylor Swift on Long Island or something. The experience of Separation was not singular in any way it was riding the collective wave of post-hardcore songs reflecting on how much life sucks, essentially.Īnyway, I was not there for that era. It was unveiled amongst a flood of other similar records: Title Fight’s Shed, La Dispute’s Wildlife, Touche Amore’s Parting the Sea Between Brightness and Me. I’m sure everyone was well-acquainted with them there before this first record. If you want to get even more specific, they’re from the same town - Doylestown - as the ever-elusive, cult-followed Superheaven. It was their debut, but they were in an emo hotspot in Pennsylvania alongside Tigers Jaw (who they released a split with a year earlier), Title Fight, and The Menzingers. Andrew recently reminisced about their golden era - ten years ago, when Separation, which some consider their magnum opus, came out on No Sleep Records. When it comes to Balance And Composure, I was late. There’s a time and place for every scene and genre, but especially for emo.

Balance and composure break up